Dear Son #1, #2, & #3,
People ask me why I write this blog and I do for a few reasons: I want to remember all of these crazy things so I can share them on your wedding day(s). I want to send comfort and laughter to other moms living this insanity. And I want to be a valuable resource for moms, moms-to-be and your poor future wives – God Bless them.
This brings me to the subject of this post which is rule #1 of parenting multiple small children…
Never leave home without a double stroller.
No matter how good you think you are. How under control you think you have things. How well-behaved your kids are. How quick your trip is going to be. Never underestimate the power of containment that a double stroller offers.
Last week was fun with the three of you. Fun for you. A trip to the doctor’s office followed by lunch at McDonald’s. With a single stroller. What could go wrong?
Mayhem. Absolute Mommy-yelling-at-kids-everywhere mayhem.
I must say, other than trashing the doctor’s office, you all did pretty good. Until we got out into the parking lot. Almost as if it was pre-meditated, #1 sprinted left, #2 bolted right and #3 rolled into an old lady’s car. And while she didn’t look super pleased about the situation, she clearly didn’t have the guts to tell me how she felt as I went on full on “Walmart-Mom-with-way-too-many-kids” mode.
I should have cut my losses right there and then but no I had go to McDonald’s still because apparently, I hadn’t had enough fun yet.
Other than a bit of spilled yogurt and a dropped French fry situation, you guys did great. Until we had to go to the bathroom. Well, #2 was so excited about the prospect of being loose in a public bathroom while his big brother was peeing that I think he managed to touch every. single. thing. in that stall. So, we had to do a thorough hand-washing while taking up almost the entire bathroom between stroller, bags and children. Then, of course, while I was trying to get the stroller out of the ridiculously small bathroom, #1 sprinted left, #2 bolted right, and #3 stayed stuck in the bathroom door. Yup, you guessed it, go Walmart Mommy go.
The point of this very true story, my dear boys, (other than the fact you seriously need to work on your listening skills) is that all of this could have been avoided with a double stroller. End of story.
Wow. Mommy needs wine just from reliving that day.
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