New Year. New You? No Way!

Dear Sons #1, #2, & #3,

Happy New Year! Happy 2024! No, you did not stay up until midnight. No, you did not get copious amounts of candy or chocolate or chips or pop just because it was New Years’ Eve. And no, you’re not going to be taught about “new years resolutions” or “new year, new me” or “goodbye 2023 and good riddance!”

We (and I mean as a collective society) welcome the new year in the same usual way. We focus on saying goodbye to the previous year with it’s heartaches, mistakes, and regrets and eagerly welcome the new year with open arms and a hope of a fresh start, a clean slate, and a problem-free horizon that we can casually sail into.

Boys, I’m here to tell you that we’re going to start greeting the new year in a different way. A way that does not criticize, rip apart, or shame the previous year. A way that doesn’t involve sighing with relief that the past year is done because the next one is bound to be better. A way that cherishes the good times and learns from the bad times without allocating all of our negative energy into the past and positive energy into the future. A way that does not look at the “fixing” we can do in the new year, but at how we can keep going down this road we call life.

Accepting, learning, growing, flourishing, and loving others and ourselves.

We’re going to say a big over-the-top “Hello!” to:
New adventures
New experiences
New mistakes
New friends
New conflicts
New challenges
New sensations
New sounds
New gratitude
New tastes (yes, it’s time to expand your palates)
New words (no, not the ones you learn on the school bus)

And we’re going to say a very substanial “Goodbye!” to:

NEW YOU!

Because trust me when I say that perfectionism doesn’t exist therefore constant self-improvement is a stressful, disheartening and dangerous road to travel down. If we look at each passing year as one where we could have done better and view the coming year as “our year”, we are going to fail miserably every time.

EVERY TIME.

I want you to grow, to try new things, to challenge yourselves and to think outside the box. But I also want you to love yourselves for who you are and embrace and learn from your past mistakes, failures and stresses.

That’s how I want to welcome the new year and say goodbye to the past one.

And yes, we can have chips, maybe some candy and still no pop with it.

Love Mommy,

XOX

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This post is part of a blog hop with Exhale—an online community of women pursuing creativity alongside motherhood, led by the writing team behind Coffee + Crumbs. Click here to view the next post in the series “Hello”.